Paint’s Peeling

The paint’s peeling off the streets again
And I’ll drive and close my eyes in Michigan
And I feel nothing, not brave
It’s a hard day for breathing again

I still can’t listen to this Rilo Kiley song. I finally got brave enough to go through the rest of this group’s loveliness as evidenced in the quote above…but this one…I can’t stomach yet…

Are you watching us? Are you laughing at the changes that are taking place? Sometimes I can hear your laugh so clearly I expect you to be waiting at my doorstep. To celebrate, to talk, to be silent, to breathe…

All this grief is supposed to make me want to live more, right? Cherish the moments as they are? Not sure I’ll ever do that…mostly still just angry that you’re not here to do it yourself.

Aisha Tyler – Self Inflicted Wounds

If you have talent and you don’t have the stones to get up every day and perfect that talent, accept criticism, look at yourself honestly, suck on the hard lozenge of failure and try to constantly and consistently improve, well then, you don’t have shit.

This is what I’m trying to do here. Take the little word demons in my brain and turn them into something magnificent, even if only for a fleeting nanosecond of my experience. There’s a lot of dark shit out in the world, that’s one of the things I love most about it. I want to have the tough conversations, be the person that says ‘That’s fucked up, yo’ about things but will still listen to the madman’s musings.

I love you crazy, stupid, beautiful, life – even if 8 days out of 10 I ponder loosing myself the mortal coil. Sometimes, you’re shiny, and I dig that.